


Title of Y(our) Sex Tape

by Kenabee



Series: no sleep till uswnt [3]
Category: Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV), Women's Soccer RPF
Genre: (I rewatched all of B99 for this), Alternate Universe - Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV) Fusion, F/F, LETS GO LESBIANS, PREATH - Freeform, a long self indulgence of making my favourite hetero relationship into a gay one, they’re a bunch of disasters, this has been so fun
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-27
Updated: 2019-08-30
Packaged: 2020-09-27 15:03:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,074
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20409721
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kenabee/pseuds/Kenabee
Summary: Preath but make it Brooklyn Nine-Nine





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is such a self indulgent path for me. Peraltiago is one of the only hetero ships I truly love so here ya go I made it gay :) 
> 
> As always, English is not my first language so please inform me of any grammar/spelling mistakes.

Tobin has to admit (to herself and only herself) that the rise she gets out of Christen is worth her date walking out on her. Would be worth it no matter who the date is, because getting a rise out of Christen is pretty much Tobin’s favourite thing in the world. 

She rolls her eyes, and her jaw clenches, but she waits, and then it happens. Her mouth twitches, just the slightest bit on the left side, and smugness and pride races through Tobin. She’s buoyant with it, smile large and wide as Christen tells her to leave them alone, and it doesn’t go away even as she tries to explain to her date, to apologise. 

(It’s not received well, but Tobin’s smile barely falters.)

~~~

Tobin might be a cop, she might care about the law and she might care about catching bad guys. But that does not make her a good person. 

If she was a good person she probably wouldn’t be so overjoyed that jumping the gun on her case, arresting her perp without evidence, actually ruins Christen’s date plans. Unfortunately she is overjoyed, can barely contain her smugness over it for the entire night. 

But then seeing her in the morning, swamped in an oversized t-shirt, hairy messy and standard issued sweats swallowing her, only brings guilt to the surface. Christen’s hair is messy, and she’s got pillow streaks on her face, and she looks so cute and sleepy and suddenly all Tobin feels is horrible for bring this on her, on all of them. 

“Please let them go home.” She begs Becky, but the captain only shakes her head. 

“Do you have the bank records?” She asks Christen, almost and hour after asking the captain. Christen slides them over in silence, jaw still clenched. “Look I’m sorry you missed your date, okay?”

“Are you?” Christen asks, and Tobin knows it’s rhetorical, knows Chris is just irritated, but it still makes her nervous. She might not understand how she feels, but she knows she doesn’t want Christen catching on. 

“Well, maybe not.” Tobin says, and smirks when Christen looks up to glare at her. “Maybe I saved you, from another boring date,with another boring guy who probably works in a bank or at whole foods. What’s his name? Mark? James? Jake? It’s something boring and dull right?”

“Okay first of all,” Christen says, voice shrill, and the anxiety in Tobin’s chest eases a bit, “ she works in a marketing firm. Second of all, I will not be telling you her name, and you will not be hearing anymore about this.”

“Whatever you say Chris.” Tobin taunts, laughs as Christen clenches her jaw again. 

It takes her another ten minutes before she picks up on what Christen said, processes the idea that Christen dates women too. It sends a jolt through Tobin’s spine, distracts her for almost ten minutes, before she shakes her head and forces herself to carry on. 

So of course then she thinks she solves the case, and doesn’t, and Christen is even more upset. Tobin doesn’t know how to handle her own emotions right now, but the sad Christen by her side, the one complaining about how dating as a cop is impossible, this she can solve. 

“Look, somewhere out there is a person, with incredibly low standards, and a penchant for dresses with pie stains on the ass and too big glasses. Someday you will find them.” Tobin squeezes Christen’s shoulder and Christen glares at her. 

“I hate you.” Tobin smirks, but it’s only a cover up. She already knows what she’s doing, pulling up Facebook and then finding who must be the woman Christen is going out with, the only person not covered in tattoos or piercings on her mutual friends with Katie list. 

Her face when Tobin tells her to leave, to go on her date, is almost worth the mess she’s made, and the complicated feelings in her stomach. She forgets about that though as everything clicks, as she solves the case, everything fades but the satisfaction of winning this case. She somehow isn’t even upset when nobody wants to get drinks after, even Kelley.

~~~

When Tobin finds Christen in Brunn’s bedroom she’s almost as unsurprised as she is by her own sneaking around. Christen might be neurotic and a stickler for organisation, but she’s just as nosy and desperate as Tobin is. Tobin wants Brunn to see her value, and she needs her wife to see it too, her own complicated feelings about parents coming up. But Christen’s drive, her need to out compete everyone else and become the captain someday, is just as strong an impulse as Tobin’s. 

When they hear Brunn and Allie coming up the stairs, the only thing to do is hide in the bathroom. With the cat. Which Christen is very allergic to. 

“Shhh shh!” Tobin whisper shouts, placing her finger to a sneezing Christen’s mouth. She’s full of panicked adrenaline, terrified of getting caught, and she doesn’t realise she’s almost pressed chest to chest with a sniffling Christen. But then the cat moves, and she moves, pushing Christen further away and to the wall, fully pressing themselves together, and she grabs a towel to place over Christen’s mouth. She’s holding it there, staring panicked into her eyes, when she realises she can feel every breath Christen takes in, can feel everywhere they’re pressed together. 

Tobin cheeks start to flame, and she’s about to take a step back, when Christen lets out a giant sneeze into the towel, and the arguing from the bedroom ceases. 

“Press, are you hiding in my bathroom with a cat that you are deathly allergic to.” Christen’s eyes go wide and Tobin answers before thinking about it. 

“Nooo.” She draws out, and jumps back as the door opens wide. Brunn stands there, slack jawed, eyes flicking between them. Tobin shrinks under her glare and feels Christen’s hands first in the back of her jacket as she shrinks back behind her. 

“What,” Brunn says, voice completely flat, “is going on here.”

“Complete invasion of privacy and lack of boundaries?” Tobin says voice high, and Brunn’s glare seems to deepen. “We’ll just go.” 

She pulls Christen behind her, bringing her hand off her jacket and into her own so she can lead them out of the house. She doesn’t let go of a still sneezing Christen’s hand, until she pulls them to her car and ushers her inside. 

“So, that could have gone better.” She says, and isn’t even surprised when Christen bursts into tears. She breathes in deep before reaching over and grabbing her hand again, rubbing it with her thumb. Christen calms pretty quickly, and she squeezes Tobin’s hand twice before leaning back and putting their hands on the middle console. 

“Sorry.” She says, and Tobin sighs. 

“Chris I’ve known you for years, you don’t have to apologise, I knew that was coming.” She’s trying to be sympathetic but Christen just huffs. 

“I wish I could just be like one of Allie’s coworkers, I wish I could be cool and suave and smart.”

“Chris those people aren’t ‘cool and suave’ they’re boring and stuck up. They might be smart but they have nothing on you.” She squeezes their hands again and turns so she’s facing Christen fully. 

“Do you really mean that?”

“Of course I do, Chris. You’re the smartest person I know.”

“Besides the Captain.”

“Oh yeah obviously.” They both laugh, and Tobin drives them home feeling a little bit better. She drops Christen off and pretends not to think about the fact that they held hands the entire way. 

~~~

The thing is, Tobin has gotten somewhat used to Amy talking about her dates, the men and the women, and it usually filters out. Usually it’s a different person the next week, nobody sticking enough to make it to more than two dates. 

But this is different, Olivia is different, and Tobin can’t figure out why it makes her so crazy. Every time Christen so much as mentions Olivia, she can feel her stomach roll unpleasantly, ants crawling over her skin. It’s surprising it takes her so long to understand why. 

~~~

“Kelley, stop it.” Tobin says, pushing her away and turning to face the bus windows. She doesn’t want to hear Kelley’s comments about her theories on Tobin’s crush or anything about how she might feel about Christen.

But then Christen is hugging someone named Olivia, and they’re talking about soccer, which is something Tobin and Christen usually talk about. She tries to introduce herself and then just leave it alone, but she can’t. 

“We should catch up later!” Olivia says and leaves to join her own squad. 

“Who was that?” Ali asks, and Tobin is definitely not eavesdropping, they’re just talking very close to her that’s all. 

“Oh we played soccer together in college, and then we took a seminar on 911 codes. We went on a few dates last year, but she lives in queens and we both just got to busy.” Christen pauses and looks over her shoulder at Olivia again. “But I liked her.”

Tobin can hear the smile on her face and she’s grateful when they walk away. She’s not so grateful when Kelley starts asking her about it, needling her. 

“Shut up, Kelley.” She says, looking down at the table and focusing on unpacking her bag with unwavering focus. She ignores whatever Kelley says next, and just continues loading the paint balls into the gun. 

She ends up next to Christen anyways, even though she’s trying to avoid her, as they take practice shots. She can’t help herself around her, and they’re joking and it’s good, and then Olivia comes up and she can feel herself deflate. So she somehow pulls Olivia away, inserting herself into the situation and ending up stuck with her at the hand gun station.

She forces herself to walk away once Christen joins, not interested in making more of a fool of herself. Of course it only gets worse when Olivia and her squad come out of the simulation, and Christen actually looks impressed by it. 

“Okay squad, I changed my mind.” She says, Kelley and Ali flicking their heads to stare at her. 

“What happened to Callie the surfer chick?” Christen asks, and Tobin shakes her head. Although she does kind of feel good that Christen remembers her persona’s name from the bus. 

“We’re taking this seriously this year. We’re going to crush that record.” She says and Kelley’s confusion clears and she rolls her eyes at Tobin, but everyone agrees. 

The only thing is she’s not very good at being serious, and the character slips out anyways, making Christen laugh whenever the odd word comes out a little too “kiwi.” It buzzes Tobin, keeps her energised to know Christen is at least a little entertained by her. 

When Tobin shoots the last of the “criminals” and Julie calls out that they beat the record by over two minutes, Christen laughs and jumps into Tobin’s arms. Tobin spins her for a second before the shouts of the rest of the squad filter though, and Christen runs off to join them at the base of the stairs. Tobin takes a deep breath in before following, and joining the team in cheering. 

But then Christen isn’t joining them for drinks, she’s going out with Olivia, and Tobin’s mood dampens heavily. She can’t help it, even when Kelley comes to sit with her in the booth and slides a new beer over to her. 

“You thinking about Christen?”

“No.” Tobin says too quickly, and then sighs. “What does she even see in Olivia, she’s so boring.”

“So you do like her.”

“I don’t know Kel. I’m just confused.” She looks down and takes a sip of the beer, wincing as she takes too big of a sip. 

“I’ll clear it up for ya. You like Christen, and you’re upset about her going out with someone else.” She’s matter of fact about it and Tobin looks up at her with a glare.

“No, I’m just wondering what she sees in Olivia. I mean sure she’s smart and she beat the course record, but then I beat her record so it didn’t even matter anyways.” She huffs and Kelley rolls her eyes. 

“Tobin do you want to know why she’s going out with Olivia and not you?” Tobin looks back down at the table mumbling a bit. “It’s because she asked her.”

Kelley gets up to leave, and Tobin stares at the other side of the booth before getting up and heading out, taking the bus back with Ali to the precinct. 

“Hey Chris.” Ali says, and Tobin head whips up to see her by their desks. 

“Hey guys, how were drinks?”

“Good.” Ali says before walking away, and Christen nods uncertainly. 

“What’s up with her?” She asks and Tobin shrugs. Christen starts putting things in her bag and Tobin shakes herself, trying to work up the courage to ask

“Hey Christen, can I ask you something?” she starts, and Chris looks up at her with an open face and a nod. Tobin’s about to continue, when she notices Christen’s eyes and lips look different. “Are you wearing makeup?”

“Oh, uh yeah,” Christen tucks a piece of hair behind her ear, “Olivia and I decided to do a full dinner instead of just drinks. Is it too much? I asked my sister but she’s a little crazy so I’m not sure?”

She’s nervous, hands twitching a little and shifting her weight. Tobin wants nothing more than to stop her from going on the date, to tell her what she was going to ask, but she can’t bring herself to do it. 

“No, you look great, Chris.” She hopes her voice comes at steadier than it feels (she’s sure it doesn’t), but Christen just smiles and nods, accepting it.

“Thank you.” She pulls her bag onto her shoulder. “What were you gonna ask me?”

“Oh it’s not important, I’ll ask you tomorrow.” 

“Oh okay, see you tomorrow!” Christen turns, and Tobin can’t help but notice the pep in her steps, how she practically radiates excitement. It’s crushing, but Tobin really is happy for her, wants Christen to be happy. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Follows the general B99 timeline. Please watch the show if you haven’t, it deserves the world.

B99 Tobin bits and pieces 2

Tobin knows the whole squad is there for her, she knows that none of them are a mole. As much as finding out about the investigation sucks, she still knows nobody here is a mole. She trusts all of them without question, more than anyone else in her life. But she can’t help that the first person she goes to for help is Christen, and she can’t help that her car is in the shop so she really does need the help. 

“Okay, so you know how I’m a really good cop but sometimes I break the rules a little?”

“I don’t think I like where this is going.” Christen says, finally putting her pen down and giving Tobin her full attention. 

“Right so I may or may not take open case files home to work on them at night sometimes and I may or may not have some at my apartment right now.” She grits it out with a cringe and Christen’s eyes go wide. 

“Tobin! You could get suspended for that!” She all but shouts, and Tobin throws a hand over her mouth before she can say more. 

“Please please give me a ride to my apartment!” Christen nods behind her hand and she lets go. 

“This better not come back to bite me in the ass.” Christen says as she grabs her keys and purse. 

“This better not bite me in the ass, title of your sex tape.” Tobin says automatically, and Christen slaps her lightly on the arm. 

It doesn’t take long to get to her apartment, and Tobin grabs the case files quickly before coming back down to Christen’s idling car. 

“Seriously, thank you so much.” She says, and squeezes Christen’s shoulder in gratitude. “But we still have to go to Megan’s because I think I left a few there when we swapped apartments.”

“Ugh fine, call her and let her know we’re on the way.” Megan doesn’t answer, but Tobin still has a key so they go up anyways. 

“Holy shit.” She hears Christen breathe, rounding the corner ahead of her, and when she follows she might barf a little in her mouth. 

“Kelley? What the hell!” She shouts, and Megan quickly pulls her robe tighter around her while Kelley buries her face in her hands. “I- what? My best friend and my oldest friend?”

“I’m sorry Tobin! I should have told you!” Kelley mutters into her hands. 

“Yeah she’s should have, I definitely wasn’t going to.” Megan shrugs, smirking. “It was too good to ruin so soon by telling you.”

“Ew, ew, ew. I so don’t want to know!” Christen’s says, putting her hands over her ears.

“You’ve been sleeping with my childhood friend? And lying to me about it? For how long?” She demands, and Kelley peeks between her fingers. 

“Um, only a month. Well we hooked up drunk last year, before you went undercover. But then not again until a month ago.”

“You’ve been lying to me for a year!” Tobin shouts, feeling hurt and betrayed, and confused, so so confused. 

“I’m sorry Tobs, I just didn’t know how to say anything. I didn’t know what to say.” Kelley looks small and scared, so Tobin takes a deep breath in and looks to the ceiling for strength. 

“Okay, we’re in a panic right now so we can’t talk, but once this is over I want us to talk, Okay?” Tobin asks and Kelley nods. “You’re still my best friend, even if it’s gross that you slept with my childhood friend.”

Megan just shrugs, before picking up a glass of wine and taking a large sip. Christen walks out, hands finally falling from her ears, and Tobin reaches into the closet to grab the case files and quickly leave. 

“Oh my god.” Christen says once Tobin gets into the car, and they both look at each other with wide eyes, before Tobin starts giggling. “Why are you laughing?”

“I have no idea.” Tobin says, and Christen starts laughing too. 

~~~

She gets caught of course, because why couldn’t she just get away with it. She was just trying to work on cases in her free time, because they wouldn’t get out of her head. Even if it’s against the rules, she hasn’t really done anything wrong (right?). 

She ends up at the captain’s house, convincing her to work on the “mole case” now that she no longer feels like she really knows her coworkers, not if she couldn’t spot Kelley or Megan lying to her for a year. 

She might get kicked out after sleepily accusing the captain, but she does end up solving the case soon after. Setting up Wuntch and recording her admitting to spying on the precinct is sweet like a jumbo bag of sour gummy bears. 

Talking to Kelley that night about the past year is not nearly as sweet, but it’s good, and even if it took a year, she’s glad Kelley eventually wanted to talk to her about it.She’s glad her best friend is branching out. She just hopes they never do it again. 

~~~

When detective Roord asks Tobin to join her at the speakeasy, Tobin is understandably stoked. She’s been admiring Roord’s track record for years now, and the possibility of hanging out with her, off work hours, and becoming friends with such an amazing detective, is more than Tobin can really handle. 

So of course Roord’s only wants to know about Christen. 

“So what’s the deal with your partner?” She asks, sipping her drink. 

“Who, Christen?” Tobin asks.

“Yeah, what’s her deal. Is she single? Does she like women?” Tobin nearly chokes on her drink. 

“Uh, yes she does like women.” She’s staring openly at Jill, not really sure what’s going on. She thought this was going to be just then hanging out, maybe reminiscing on old cases or talking about movies. 

“Cool, and you guys aren’t dating, right?” Tobin looks away to face the shelves on the other side of the bar, clutching her drink. 

“Uh no, we’re not dating. Why do you ask?” Her voice has gotten squeaky again, but Roord doesn’t seem to notice. 

“I just wanted to make sure. I’m thinking I’ll ask her out, once the case is solved.” Tobin turns to look at Jill again, who’s staring at her with a raised eyebrow. 

“Cool, yeah, cool cool cool.” Jill nods and orders them more drinks, and luckily doesn’t bring it up again. 

(Tobin does not enjoy the rest of the evening, unfortunately.)

~~~

“What’s up with you?” Ali asks and Tobin sighs. 

“Would you be surprised if I told you I might still like Christen just a teensy bit?”

“Nope, not even a little.” Ali says and Tobin throws her head back and groans. “Why are you bringing this up now?”

“Roord wants to ask Christen out.” She says and Ali raises an eyebrow. “Our supercool speakeasy hangout was just so she could ask me about Christen’s sexuality and relationship status. She wants to ask her out when the case is over.”

“Ew, really?” Ali asks, and frowns when Tobin just huffs. “Why don’t you just ask her out first?”

“Sure, or I could just prolong the case as much as possible, right?” Ali looks unimpressed at that, but Tobin ignores it and walks away. 

Tobin does try to keep the case going, tries to push down on every instinct she has to be a good cop, but she still puts it together the next day. Once she sees the cleaning company’s name it all clicks and she shouts it out before she can think about it. 

“Fuck, wait Chris before we go arrest people, I need to ask you something.” Christen’s raises and eyebrow and pauses, and Tobin completely chokes. “I just wanted- maybe we- I ask- what you say- case closed.”

“Why doesn’t your mouth work?”

“Why doesn’t your mouth work title of our sex tape.” Tobin immediately says, and then panics. 

“What?”

“I mean title of your sex tape! Anyways stop dawdling we have a case to finish, take this seriously Press!”

“I-what?” Christen says, but thankfully just follows Tobin as she practically runs from the room. 

~~~

“How’d it go last night?” Tobin finds herself asking Roord, even though she very much doesn’t want to know. 

“Uh, actually not good.” Roord says, frowning, and Tobin perks up. 

“Oh? Why not?”

“She turned me down. I’ve never been turned down before,” she pauses to frown harder, “I did not like it very much.”

“Ok-aayy.” Tobin says as Roord walks away, and looks at Ali. “What does that mean? Did Chris turn her down? What was she thinking?”

“Tobin.” Ali growls. 

“Yup I will go ask her myself.”

Christen is making coffee in the break room, and Tobin knocks on the door as she comes in, leaning against the counter to face her. 

“Hey, everything okay?” Christen asks. 

“Yeah, you know I just spoke to Roord. She looks a little crushed, what’d you do to her?” Christen rolls her eyes and huffs. 

“I didn’t do anything! I thought we were just getting drinks but she thought it was a date, and I was not interested in that.”

“You weren’t interested in going out with Jill Roord? Are you sick?” Tobin asks and Christen laughs, throwing her head back just a bit. It makes Tobin’s stomach warm and fuzzy, and god she wishes she didn’t like Christen so much. 

“No, it’s just, after Olivia I realised how messy it is dating cops. I mean if you break up you still have to work with them.” She huffs and looks down at the ground. “I just, my new rule is no dating cops, it’s just too much.”

“Oh,” Tobin tries to breathe in, but it’s shallow and she feels a little light headed. “Yeah cool cool cool. It’s funny that you say that, because I also recently decided not to date cops anymore. From here on out it is criminals or bartenders for me.”

“Isn’t it messy if you break up with your bartender too?” Christen asks, smirking at Tobin. 

“Well, I mean, yes, a little.” She stumbles and Christen laughs again. 

“At least with criminals you can throw them in jail after.” Christen says, and they both laugh. 

“Exactly.” Tobin says, and she hates how cute it is when Christen pushes the hair on both sides of her ears back, bringing her face face front and center again and biting her lip slightly. Tobin does an awkward about face, and leaves the break room without another word.

~~~

“Why are you trying to keep me off this case?” Christen corners her in the break room, and Tobin jumps. 

“I’m not- why would you think-“

“Seriously Tobin, why don’t you want to work with me.” She looks upset, really upset, and Tobin forces herself to take a deep breath. 

“Okay, so you know how,” she stops and cringes, “youknowhowyoutoldmeyoudon’twanttodatecops? Wellthatreallybumbedmeout. Becauseiwasgoingtoaskyouout.”

“Uh What?” Christen says and Tobin cringes even harder. 

“I feel awkward around you because I still like you and I’m bad at emotions?” Christen freezes, her expression going blank, and Tobin panics harder. “But that’s not me pressuring you! I know you’re not dating cops anymore and I totally understand and I agree and we are so totally okay totally totally okay!”

“The whole point of me not dating cops is so it won’t be weird and now it feels weird.” Christen says, rubbing a hand over her forehead. 

“It’s not weird! It’s only weird if we say it’s weird and I say it’s not weird.” Christen raises an eyebrow and Tobin sighs. “Look, nothing has to change, I can be professional, and I know you can be professional, so we just have to be professional.”

“Yeah, Heath we can totally do that.” Christen nods and smiles, and Tobin’s knees might go a little weak at the sight of it but that’s okay because she will ignore it. 

“Totes profesh!” She raises a hand for s fist uno but Christen just roles her eyes before leaving the break room. Tobin sighs and bangs her head against the vending machine (which luckily knocks her stuck candy bar loose). 

~~~

Of course then the stakeout is a mess, and somehow Christen has to wear Ali’s leather jacket and she looks amazing, and they somehow end up pretending to be a couple. 

“Oh no that’s horrible!” Christen says when the hostess turns them down. “This is our anniversary, and we just got engaged and our first date was here and we were hoping to eat here, but Emma here forgot to set a reservation!”

“It would mean so much to Dora and I, if there’s anything at all available.” She definitely doesn’t jump at all when Christen pinches her at the name Dora, although she probably deserves it. “I didn’t know if she was going to say yes so I didn’t want to jinx it!”

Christen leans in to kiss her cheek and Tobin can feel her cheeks flare up, feel the host’s eyes locked on her face, but she can’t control it. 

“Awe you two are so cute, I’m so glad queer couples are out and proud these days!” The waitress says enthusiastically, and Christen’s hand tightens on her arm. “Let me see what I have for you!”

“That would be great, thank you so much!” Christen says, and Tobin agrees after a second, once she tugs on her arm. They get a table, which is great, and it’s next to their perp and his girlfriend, also great, but of course the hostess has told the couple that they just got engaged, so they have to keep selling the story. 

“So how did you guys meet?” Their perp asks, and Tobin feels lucky that somehow she and Christen say the same number. 

“Three years ago.” The couple smiles and asks for the story, so Christen continues. “We met at a bar actually, I was getting hit on by a very annoying and pushy guy, and Tobin was my knight in slacks. She stepped up and pretended to be my girlfriend, and even got the creepy guy kicked out of the bar. We’ve been dating ever since.”

Christen looks at her with soft, adoring eyes, and Tobin nearly chokes on her champagne (courtesy of the couple) at the sight of them. She reaches across and grabs Tobin’s hand, and Tobin thinks her head is actually going to fall off. 

“So, what made you know she was the one?” The woman asks Tobin, and her eyes go wide. 

“I would love to answer that.” She takes a deep breath in and looks at Christen before continuing. “You know, just whenever I look at her face, and her attached body, I just feel... butterflies.”

It’s too honest, and Christen’s face goes red in a way Tobin hasn’t seen before, which is interesting. 

“And you?” The woman points to Christen who shifts nervously. 

“Uh, well she,” Christen pauses and a soft smile takes over her face, “she makes me laugh.” 

“Yeah, and you know, there’s no one who’s opinion matters more to me.” Tobin says, and Christen’s answering smile and agreement is worth how completely awful and horrible all of this is probably going to feel tomorrow.

They make it through a few more questions before the couple finally pays their check. The perp sends his girlfriend off to get the car, while he heads into the back. They follow, trying to be sneaky, but then the perp looks at them through the kitchen door and Tobin does the only thing she can think of. 

She grabs Christen and pulls her in, wrapping her arms around her back, and closing her eyes (to really sell it). Christen gasps into Tobin’s mouth, before melting into it, one hand wrapping around her shoulder and the other going into her hair. Tobin’s lost in it, in the feeling of how soft Christen’s lips are, and when her tongue brushes against Tobin’s lips she opens too easily. 

“Excuse me.” Tobin hears, and they both jump. They keep their arms wrapped around each other, but pulled apart, and Christen looks dazed as they stare at their perp. 

“Sorry,” Tobin gets out, “we were just looking for a place to...”

“Bionk!” Christen’s says suddenly and Tobin cringes. 

“Ah yes, that.” She winces, but their perp just laughs. 

“I get it, you’re newly engaged, enjoy it while it lasts.” He says, and it’s too bad he’s a criminal because he might actually be a cool guy. He walks away and Christen pulls back immediately. 

“Cool so we saved that!” Tobin says and Christen nods enthusiastically. 

“Yup, that was great, quick professional thinking out here!” Her voice is high and raspy, somehow, and Tobin feels shaken. 

“Totes profesh.” She says, and then cringes. “anyways we should, uh, keep following him.”

“Yup, mhmm.” They leave quickly, and Tobin forces herself not to think about Christen’s lips or back or anything but the perp they are chasing. Especially not with Kelley and Ali in the car waiting for them. Of course then Ali ruins it right away. 

“You guys kissed, didn’t you.” She says, and Christen chokes. 

“Why would you think that?” Tobin asks, voice high and squeaky. 

“You have Christen’s lipstick on your mouth.” 

“Fuck.” Tobin quickly wipes her hand across her mouth, trying to wipe it off. 

“Tell me everything, now!” Kelley shouts, and Christen flinches back further into her seat. 

“It was to keep our cover, it was nothing!” Tobin says, and it’s the truth but it’s also a big fat lie. It was definitely more than nothing. For her at least. 

“It’s only nothing until you grab each other’s butts.” Ali says, and both Tobin and Christen choke. They catch up to the perp then though, just as he drops his briefcase at a park bench, and splitting away from Ali and Kelley is a sweet relief. 

“So, we’re okay right?” Tobin asks, and Christen looks away from the dropped bag to blink at her. 

“Yeah, totally, we’re fine.” She says and Tobin relaxes. 

“You know I’m actually kind of hungry, we never got to eat at the restaurant.” Christen’s snorts and looks at Tobin fondly. 

“Tobs you’re literally always hungry.” Tobin opens her mouth to protest but Christen just shakes her head. “You know what I’m gonna get on my way home?”

“Yes,” Tobin says, also rolling her eyes, “you’re going to stop at Merritt’s and get a turkey club with a lemon scone on the side, and a chamomile tea.”

“That’s, exactly what I’m going to get?” Christen looks at her weirdly and Tobin laughs. 

“Yup.” She smiles, “I’m going to Toni’s and I’m going to get two slices of meat supreme and a coke.”

“Meat supreme? You know that’s like a cholesterol death sentence right?” Tobin rolls her eyes and is about to argue, when Christen suddenly gasps, yanks her in, and starts kissing her again. 

She pushes her against the tree and Tobin’s stomach flies to her throat, she feels dizzy and light headed, and suddenly Christen is pulling back to whisper in her ear, making Tobin shiver against her. 

“Sorry, but the pick up is here, he was looking at us.” Tobin doesn’t look, knows it could ruin the arrest, but she jumps with Christen when she pulls her badge out. 

“NYPD you are under arrest! And we are colleagues!” Christen shouts, and Tobin pointsher gun up. 

“Hands on your head! This was a work event!” She cringes after she says it, but neither of them bring it up which is nice. 

~~~

“Hey, can you sign this report?” Tobin asks, handing Christen the file. 

“Sure.” She says, and Tobin sighs fondly as she pulls out her signature pen. 

“You know it’s ridiculous you have a pen just for signatures, right?”

“You know you say that every time, right?” Christen says, but she smiles anyways. But then her her smile fades and she looks down at the table before looking back up. “This whole night was weird, I’m sorry.”

“No I’m sorry, I just wish everything could go back to normal!” Tobin says, and she really means it, because she can’t get the thought of kissing Christen out of her head. 

“Me too!” Christen smiles. “So that’s that, everything can just go back to normal and we’ll pretend it never happened, right Heath?”

“Right, Press.” They both smile at each other and Tobin leaves the break room with the newly signed file, smile dropping as soon as Christen can’t see her. 

Of course their good moods are ruined when Brunn announces that she’s being transferred to the public relations office. Tobin follows Christen to the records room, giving her a good three minutes of anxiety-panic time before she enters. 

“Hey, thought I’d find you here.” She says and Christen smiles shakily. She’s not crying though, which is probably a good sign. 

“Yeah, I just needed to get away for a second, clear my head.” She pauses and looks at Tobin. “How are you doing?”

“Me? Oh I’m repressing the hell out of it.” She says and it works, Christen’s laugh coming out in a quick burst and taking a step closer to Tobin. 

“This is a lot of change, isn’t it?” Christen says, and Tobin can’t help it, they’re already pressed chest to chest, and it’s too easy to lean forward, to press their lips together. 

Christen goes easily, melting into her, and their arms wrap around each other. Tobin moves them, until she’s pushing Christen back against the records shelf, and Christen gasps a little into her mouth. Their tongues get tangled and Tobin pushes herself more firmly against Christen. 

She yanks herself back quickly, surprised and shocked by her own behaviour, and stares at a wide eyed Christen. Christen’s hand goes to her mouth and Tobin gapes for a second. 

A knock on the door interrupts, and she hears Kelley shouting for them that the new captain is coming. They both leave, quickly and without speaking to each other, to greet the new captain. 

(Who has a heart attack as soon as he walks in.)


End file.
